i tried. i really did. and i must say, im not liking any minute of it. fine. i admit i dont really hate it. but the point is, im getting slightly irritated already. it shoots off any minute and i cant stop it. the point is, i have to spend my time explaining and thats more irritating than anything else.

you see, i cant stand people forcing me to do what i dont want to do. and here it is pushingme to do stuff i hate.

i tried. i really did.
and it doesnt work.

i might resign any moment soon.
like. soon.

im really afraid i'll just lose my cool any moment. and i cant afford that. because i dont want to think of the consequences of that. i might just cause the suffering.




oh yay. im stuck with physics and i.s.

wahhh forgot about i.s. ws today xD so in the end i had to finish question 7 during lunch. with help from jy the great, of course x)

anyway im so freaking dead. im getting really slack. like. really really slack. and incidentally, extremely forgetful too. so that means i have to ask my mum to remind me to bring stuff when my memory is supposed to be better than hers

exco voting today. (incidentally, council elections application starts today too. i think im not running. next yr perhaps x))

anyway i really dont want to be in exco. i mean, one of the rules (set by me x)) stated that the person must "have the ability to lead" which i, unfortunately, do not have. the class doesnt listens to me anyway.

so. yeah. the class should let only nelson lewis and tiffany be in exco. not me. just merge treasurer and secretary. and *poof* there goes your three ppl exco.

you have power, sure, in exco. but yeah. i dont think i can lead.

my mum says it lack of confidence and too concerned about what others think. but the problem is, the world doesnt revolve around me. there are other people in the world too and there's no point if i care about me and just only me. (yeah yeah i know im egocentric (courtesy of tiffany bong :)))

on a lighter note, its a non-stress tuesday tmr (:

haha i must say, today was pretty fun (:

started with 2.4 first, it was okayy. except i didnt really exert myself today because i started to sprint at the wrong station. so. yeah. and i realised its better if i stop occasionally for short breaks. then once during the run kaihui was like holding my hand and walking with me >.< she did that to danielle to. except she made danielle run really hard.

anyway after 2.4 went to the "beach" with stinky ugly girly messy and sneaky. the breeze was really nice. then we saw wy preparing for the yr 2's tugofwar. then we were like "why cant we play that too? hopscotch is so stupid" then she was like "its too dangerous for you" hmph. we're only one year younger kayyy! xD

anyway went back and started on hopscotch. the first round was stupid! we just held hands and hopped and hopped and hopped. and tiff was like shouting and shouting for ppl to go back when they haven't even reached yet -.- anyway the first round was really stupid and everybody all insisted 105 cheated because they only stopped at 6. even mariel agreed. lol!

anyway the second was with the tissue. so it was like just jump in pairs lor. pretty easy la. except for throwing the tissue >.< and the squeezing part. we won!! (:

<>
messy: lai lai (she meant come sit down)
stinky: omg you sounded like a *ahemm**ahemm*
everybody: orrhhhhhh
somebody: she's too violent
stinky: violent then good what
everybody: orrrhhhhh
gor: omg cheryl you're so sick.
me, tiff: think straight ppl. think straight.
[after a while]
gor: that sms sounded sick
me: you're supposed to think straight. think straight.
tiff: ya, think straight!
us: why cant you ppl just think straight.
lewis: we're thinking straight in the wrong direction
(lol!)

so anyway next was like the fear factor thingy. and i got wasabe xD luckily i didnt get the belacan, or im gonna be so dead. but we finished last anyway. the teachers finished first. waaaa.

during the thing my throat was burning cos i just gulped the wasabe down and i was like "oh no im gonna puke" then i drank like half a bottle of newater and gave the other half to jiahui when she was eating some weird thingy that looked gross xD

anyway fleming got second!! yayy! (:

freakk. after i bathed i got a really bad stomachache and felt like puking so i was like lying on the bed for 10mins. then the pain miraculously disappeared. so i went down for lunch. and surprisingly, it tasted really great. xD and after that i fell asleep almost immediately.

wahaha i finally sent the history project thingys to zongxuan >.<

okay umm. havent blogged in a while so anyway

today's chinese was okayy. the whole class was pretty boring. and some ppl even prepared a script for the lesson thingy! (looks over at jiahui and tiff) wahhh im so slack >.< and cheryl was totally funny today, but laoshi wasnt too happy with her. ANYway its so unfair! i presented like on monday and laoshi said she didnt count points for monday! so now i have to present again or its a zero for my project! freakk.

today was scary. i totally left the i.s. worksheet blank! except q8. then during break i copied question 6 from gor xD and crapped out q2 and q9. and redrew my whole drawing. and i totally forgot to prepare my i.s. presentation. i mean, i thought the presentation was last week so i rehearsed last week, but i probably forgot everything liao. and tiff did a script again! oh no. maybe i should start doing scripts. lets start with english next wk >.<

but anyway it was extra extra fun in i.s. today! we made globby floppy gloob! (okay that my name for it) it was extra extra fun to make! too bad the pink one failed because there wasnt enough pva to go around. lewis had to hog the bottle! xD anyway made a purple and palelimegreen globby floppy gloob and they were prettaye xD but the purple was a little too dry. nelson's grey little gloob called "grey" was the nicest to play with. it was like just the right stickiness la! and he insisted he poisoned grey when he touched my purple gloob (called "purple") it was really weird. and stinky made a coral gloob! but purple was nicer anyway. xD messy's purple was really nice too! but the turqoise was the nicest i think.

anyway after a little bit of fun went to the canteen for lunch, while making lame jokes about stinky on the way. and stinky was making lame jokes about me. xD anyway jy came in with a pale green gloob that was the exact same colour as the canteen tables! and this GM here got her first errand >.< passing COO her physics textbk. haha!

anyway lit was okay. and there's this display for humans week. we're too ambitious. but its worth trying ANYway (:

then about the exco, ms koh let us come up with the list and everything ourselves. we decide. we vote. we be happy. so, yeah.

and some really irritating ppl had to spoil my day.
anyway. my mum was great today! (:

<3 stinky crazy girly ugly sneaky messy
<3 ceo coo pa and that crp2ar thingy

HAHAAHAA it was so funny during jap today! it was damn damn damn funny. it was this weird song about the verb forms. and tricia was laughing and laughing and laughing and me and adeline started laughing. we were so freaking loud. but miraculously only the other students around us heard us. it was SO FREAKING FUNNY! it was partly because of the song itself and partly because of the sushi/rice/bryce part (: HAHAAHA. damn funny! the three of us were like laughing for 15mins until:
1. tricia got a stomachache
2. adeline did some really weird thing
3. my whole face was red >.<
4. the st nicks girls were staring at us
5. the rgs girls thought we were crazy

it was DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN funny la! :D

my digestive system is extremely efficient. i got hungry at 10:30 today so i ate a heavy lunch. but barely 4 hours later, during pe, i was starviing. i was thinking "hurry up i wanna get home and have dinner" i was seriously hungry. and i got a freaking stitch. in the end i went to eat some mamee after pe (: delicious.

hmm. didnt run much during pe today cos i was so hungry >.< i swear im gonna fail 2.4 freak.

wahaha ive got time to slack today cos i finished my i.s. assignment thingy yesterday. now only left everything else thats supposed to be passed up next week + one question of i.s ws and one question of physics and optional chem ws. wahaahaa. so free! (looks at everybody else rushing out i.s.)

[you never know who to trust and what to trust.]

lalala. slack slack slack playing gz later. (:

anyway nothing much today. innovation programme was better than expected. and lewis was so mean today ): he didnt have to make it so obvious right? she'll be hurt k. she *almost* didnt want to go anymore. hmph hmph.

anyway went to j8 today. boriiing place. its like the thousandth time all the third lang ppl went there. but went to ice lemon tee to get some hairties anyway. and went to food court etc. etc. etc.

jap was more fun than usual. but in the second part of the lesson i was really tired already so...
too bad. :p

when i went home i realised my sis went to j8's icelemontee too. just that i went in at 2plus she went in at 3. haahaa.

okay. i shall work hard on my hw this weekend. kampate kudasai!

okayy. im blogging in the school's computer lab.

ok lets see. reached school this morning and found out ms koh wasnt here. so anyway it started raining and got all dark early in the morning and it was prettaye. it was like so dark and the school is full of people. and it felt great.

anyway assembly. had to run after mr ku to pass him the file. he didnt hear me at first though it was so loud (i think.)

anyway nothimg much. chinese next. went to get the key from the security guard only to find out the chinese classroom was already open. hmph.
anyway break. i almost forgot to print the stuff for lit. luckily i saw the sms again and went to find nelson for his thumbdrive (: anyway the rest of break was spent with chua mariel ger trying to tie my hair for me. and it turned out weird anyway.

i.s. next. some yr 2s came in to weigh some weird thing. anyway mr sukandar's so nice (: i.s. was quite fun today. i mean, the second part was fun.

anyway had lunch. was trying to convince whaipeng to lend me her ipod (: haahaa tmd rawks! (: (:

anyway lit next. so hard to get the class's attention. so i shouted and shouted (okay maybe not so many times). but somebody came to the com lab 45mins later ANYway asking for what we were supposed to do. freakk la. so i decided to write everything on the board and they can figure it out themselves.

and here i am trying to research the lit stuff while blogging (:

(oh damn. where did that website go)

shit. i really dont wanna sacrifice my saturdays for a maths class or whatever.
okayy was really shocked during assembly today. i was like 'no wayyy'. anyway i told gor i wasnt gonna go for the training. because
1. i just dont feel like it (: [okay that points to a problem with my attitude. but ANYway, saturdays are for chionging projects!]
2. i was probably tyco so i'll be the stupidest person in the class or something
3. its on saturdays.
4. it mightclash with chem.
5. its on saturdays.
6. i'm the only girl from nushigh.
7. its on saturdays.

8. its on saturdays.

100000000. its still on saturdays

anyway went to ask ms cheong. and unfortunately the chem thing only starts in term 4. haii.

anddd as expected, my mum told me to go. ('its such a good opportunity!') okay fine.
time to not go against my mum for once to thank her for teaching me chem.

ANYway.
- ive got to run up to the classroom everymorning to unlock the door for the class (aka the security guard etc.) and i think i'll lose the key >.<
- chinese was ummm. not very pleasant.
- break. went with the 105 ppl again.
- physics. okayy i finally met our physics teacher. ms angela lim (right? >.<) and well, she was okayy. but mr wee's still betta! (:
- ms chua! okay history is getting slightly more interesting. at least the pace is faster now.
- some weird games in audi. the first game was really amusing.
- lunch. fries (again xD)
- all the yr 1s went for dance late xD so fen had to wait for us. xD
- mariel was talking about weird stuff. and i was telling her about the jelly, the duck and the beancurd. (but she didnt get who they were ANYway)
- dance was okay. quite boring actually.
- jap. (damn.) finallyi dont have to study for any quizzes or tests etc. in the bus.
- was supposed to have 'oral practice' but it didnt happen anyway.
- was pigging out on skittles with tricia during break
- got 8.6 for jap compo only. (damn.)
- had a lotof trouble trying to complete ws 3. (aka a sign for me to study jap more often xD)
- was trying to find reasons not to bathe after i reached home because finish bathing = start on homework >.<
- finished chinese in 30 mins. haahaa. 3 questions only!
- trieddoing some history. (but didnt succeed ANYway)
- hah! finally touched my chinese dictionary and started looking up all the shen1ci2s in the lu xun passage. (i havent touched a dictionary in months)
- did maths filing. didnt know what needed my mum's signature so i told her to sign on every single quiz. and the exams too.


remind myself to:
1. bring the key (!!) [or im dead]
2. bring the maths file (!!) [or mr ku will kill me]

theres i.s. tmr. damn. 04 said it was really hard >.<

damn. i didnt yu4xi2 the ciyus for the next kewen. donglaoshi cant call me in class! ):

[i think i have like 'pick me to answer the question' on my face or something. all the teachers picked on me today ): ]

and i think there's something wrong with my memory power. (even jy said i had laorenchidaizhen) (oh yeah, remember laoyachidaizhen? aka da moderator of the p6gep thingy (: aka me.) ANYway i keep forgetting what hw i have.

lets see. after barely 2 weeks.
i forgot:
1. my health booklet.
2. put my clips in my pocket but thought i didnt so i went round today without my clips and looking like i just woke up or something
3. my pe attire (but the whole class didnt go for pe ANYway)
4. my english textbook (but it was the first lesson xD)
5. what my locker code was. so i had to try like 10 thousand times before finally getting it.
6. about donglaoshi's key.
7. the geog notes i was supposed to pass to jean.

thats:
forgetting one thing per two days.

my memory is so great.

(wahhh im listening to some extra extra nice song now)(its extra extra nice)(have i said it before? it is extra extra nice) --------------------------> (okay im being lame)

booo. i dont wanna go to sch tmr!

and that reminds me! we havent done axis!

damn damn damn damn damn.

i passed!!! i passed!! i passed! (: (: (: (:

i swear im the happiest person on earth (:

woohoo! i passed! *beams*
i almost couldnt pass (:

anyway. now i'll be taking the bridging module for the new yr 3s next year on saturdays to replace this chem module. then next year i'll be going to be taking the yr 3 module, meaning this year's year 2 ppl's module. and the hands on chem module for yr 2s too.

and this sem i'll just be taking the prac. i might sit in for some lessons. i really want more practise or something. i mean, honestly, im not too familiar with the module yet.

(gz rawks!)
(: (: (: (: (: (: (: (:

*beams*

songs have the power to do things that other stuff cant do to me. i actually cried listening to some jap song on this jap show. it barely lasted for 2mins. i didnt even cry when i was watching grave of the fireflies.

my mum was behind me when i cried. so i pretended i needed the toilet badly.

im dead.
we havent started on the history project yet.
and, well... i cant get any of them to start on it.

i really hope it turns out well.

oh and that reminds me. i still have an integrated science project.
hmm.

okay im feeling slightly more emotional today. its like a whole lot of feelings put together. happy, moody, calm, angry etc. etc.

its slightly more windy today. currently sitting right beside the window. just on a chair and my laptop on my lap. the clouds moved especially fast. as in it was just there, in the middle of the sky 10 seconds ago. now its behind those houses over there. and ive got piglet beside me now. haha. i realised:

-my neighbour's currently renovating the house.
-the same neighbour has a weirdlooking light.
-both of my other neighbour's cars are gone.
-one of my neighbours just came back. like. now. he's driving into the driveway now.
-theres a plot of weird land just behind the other semidetached estate and my estate. its like not developed yet.

okay enough about the 'scenery' here. its getting warm in here. its slightly less windy now.

okay today was better than expected. our class spirit was great. (i think.)
anyway went to sch, flagraising. then the ppl came and collected money. donated all my coins. went to the audi. got a really short briefing. and the class left the audi. not together, of course. guess the 'class spirit' thing doesnt work in the morning. anyway half the class were in the audi, one quarter outside the music studio waiting for them. and another one quarter already at the station. haahaa. anyway we finally got together as a class. the floaters walked past us without noticing. haahaa.

anyway first station. some blindfolding thing. got blindfolded. and i was trying to return lewis his shoe i think. anyway we played two more times.

[oh no my sis came up and is chasing me away from the window. ): it is supposedly her di pan cos its her side of the room.]

then next station it was some dna code thingy on the paper. so we went near the bio lab part. it was quite easy. just tie legs together and walk up a flight of stairs. just that the string will tighten occasionally. but i was wearing jeans so no trouble. the girls all held hands on the concourse cos there wasnt a railing.

anyway next up was captains 'cabbage', as sab insisted. i gotta admit it was pretty fun. haahaa. but the cabbage was too light! anyway we played until the stump was smashed.

anyway got our stuff and moved on to the frog thingy game.

it was quite easy since mr ku did it with us before. anyway we beat 104's timing of 13 seconds. haahaa. so funny. we were trying and trying. it was originally 16. then 15. then 14. then 16. then 11. when lewis was chosen to guide the ppl he was like 'autorun! autorun!' dorothy came in once during the game and told us to do our class cheer.

grace almost didnt want to give us our clue! anyway begged her and she did. haahaa.

next station. water bombs thingy. only transported 2 over. the first three nelson and sz smashed. then nelson was like 'next time i count to three then you throw!' haahaa. damn funny. anyway we changed strategy and in the end one of the water bombs smashed in our gabbage bags. hahaa.

anyway next station was in the hall. roy ang made us complete the thing thrice. then we had to stop quite a few times. but overall it was great! haha.

finished early. so went for break. got a drink. [i was dehydrating] limeade, as usual. hahaa. anyway sab cheryl lynnette dan fiza hanisah came. so me and tiff had to get our class flag. the purple was so nice! but cheryl wouldnt let us get it cos it was the 'international gay colour' and the pink was pretty nice too. but got blue anyway. went to take the spray paints and other stuff in audi and started our class flag. the guys werent helping! hmph. only yuhan was building the thing. anyway we finished the flag and was focusing on building.

halfway through the guys came to help. (finally). and they balance one table on two others. and it fell and hit my leg! it didnt hurt that much but now theres a huge blueblack right there. anyway our whole thing didnt really work. so in the end we just let down the bucket and the flag was raised. haahaa. we arent exactly the brainiest class. and 105 (jy and mariel) was boasting about theirs being able to work. then whaipeng said later that the thing was out so in the end panchuen did something. so they skipped a few steps. but anyway i gotta admit, their thing was pretty good.

anyway rushed to audi and after debrief went to staffroom. shaun and jonathan were ahead of me. so anyway ger called ms cheong on her hp and she came out. the seminar rooms were used so we got the chem lab instead. anyway the test was pretty easy, only 5 marks worth of questions i wasnt confident of getting. i left 3 marks blank i think. then the 2 marks were pretty lame answers i gave. anyway it was easier than i expected. but 40/45 is only 88.88888888..%!! i need 90%. i really hope i can get a half of a mark more. hahaaa.

anyway met adeline tricia nelson on the way. went to wait for the bus together. then on the bus me adeline tricia whaipeng were talking about bryce being sissy and kosa being a poor thing etc. etc. and about how weijin and bredfad (wadever i still dunno how to spell his name) are not on good terms. put them together and a war will start. and then we were talking about kohsensei. and tricia and whaipeng insisted she hated them. then tricia insisted that she loves me alot. yeah riiight.

anyway this third lang lesson was better. i actually understood what kohsensei was saying. anyway funan took tricia's seat. and nelson was gonna take my seat. but kohsensei didnt let them cos i was originally sitting there. so nelson had to sit beside weilun, and funan had to sit beside brenda. so tricia me and adeline got to sit together again (:

anyway during break adeline me nelson went to the water cooler. and adeline was washing her hands there and wetting her brop. (btw the brop was so freaking cuute!) and me and nelson were like "brooms arent supposed to be wet. a brop has the properties of a broom." then adeline insisted brops had a mop's properties too. hahaaa.

anyway nelson said we were supposedly unscrupulous to wash our hands there. then he was like 'nvm i shall be unscrupulous too' and went to wash his hands there. -.-

anyway went back, passed the rest of the lesson really boringly. and i was like writing 'im in love with doodling' on my jap textbk. and tricia only saw the first three words cos i havent written the last two yet. but she saw the whole thing later anyway.

i was doodling and doodling in class. whoopsy.

anyway near the end i suddenly realised steph was sitting at the back of the class! i thought she wasnt here today! whoopssy!!!

anyway class ended (finally) and nelson was complaining about an antisocial weilun cos he daoed nelson in class. anyway nelson begged me to change place with him. like, would i? i would much prefer tricia and adeline to some antisocial guy thank you.

anyway i was standing there talking to tricia beside the road cos i thought my mum wasnt here yet. turned out she was waiting at the busstop already whoopsy! anyway she drove in front so i didnt have to walk all the way to the busstop. haahaa.

there isnt a moon today. and the clounds are large. im back at my window again. and its getting really windy again. time to return my sis her fan! (: the nightview's fantastic.

(aww mann shouted at the class too much today. im getting a slight uncomfortable feeling in my throat. and that reminds me. im short of 4 glasses of water.)

have been really busy for the past few days. and finally today im done with hw due tmr and im taking time off chem.

ok.. um.. [events arranged in chronological order (: ]

- happy school reopening (not)
- met jy cleo janelle and everybody else! <3
- new maths and english teacher. the class wasnt too happy with our new maths teacher.
- got two english 'projects'
- another lunchless day
- pe was boring
- end of monday
- two math period today. everybody was groaning.
- had ms chua for history!! haahaa. and the guys had to let ms chua know that we know about the chocolates. ):
- was split into grps according to chocies. got zongxuan funan ryan. uh-huh. im really not too sure about the teamwork.
- tiff joined fibo cheerleading
- chem was okay. yayy! ms cheong's still teaching us! (:
- wats after that?

- oh yeah was being lame with the lizard, the fish, and (the) jiayu. and stephanie.
- stayed to wait for mummy i think.
- mugged till 11 cos chem test was tmr.
- end of tuesday.
- ms cheong said chem test postponed to friday. janelle was unhappy cos she didnt like me to be totured any further
- higher chinese to start the day. ):
- omg!!! mr wee!!!!! yayy! [but he claimed he was only reliefing for our absent female physics teacher. and 105 thinks we're lucky cos we didnt get ms ang. but look who got mr ku? ): ]
- ms chua again! haahaa. pretty interesting. but i was still worried about the hist project ):
- mentoring. donovan came and 'mentor'. but seriously, the guys were too noisy so we couldnt really hear what he was saying.
- discussed for fri. guys not helping. ): got rough idea out, but i swear it wont work. [yeah i came up with original. then lynnette change here change there.]
- lunch with 105 ppl again.
- dance. new dance steps. not much diff. at the moment.
- rush rush rush to catch the bus. but bus driver not there -.-
- tricia couldnt sit with us during jap cos the place was taken by some guy from some sch. ):
- i couldnt understand what kohsensei was saying at all during jap. [didnt study for lesson 8]
- almost failed jap quiz. 6/10. damn! i should have mugged jap too rather than mug for chem only.
- was counting down to break and dismissal with adeline.
- during break rushed to buy jap bk. queue too long so i decided not to buy.
- 1min before break ended the queue was leftwith 2 ppl. whaipeng and nelson accompanied me to bkshop.
- thought would be late for class but kohsensei came back late.
- dismissal.
- didnt do chem. was doing jap hw and chinese hw.
- end of wednesday.
- 101 merged with 105 and 106 today in the concourse (haahaa)
- mr sukanda(r?) said to announce to the class that i.s. lessons will be in chem lab 2.
- higher chinese to start the day again.
- laoshi needed ppl to take the key. so lewis nelson tiff me take turns.
- during break we were discussing for fri.
- almost the whole class went to i.s. together. almost "squeezed" in lift. [haahaa only like 10ppl?]
- was practising dance steps with tiff outside the lab.
- did some weird stufff in first activity during i.s. played with oobleck in the second. lynnette almost dumped a whole lot on my polo tee!
- asked for more corn starch for ooblecking!
- was discussing about potato chips with mr sukanda(r?). he said ruffles was nicer. but honestly, lays sour cream n onion is nicer!
- lunch.
- lit enrich. class of 11 ppl. tiff sat in cos she was bored. she missed loci because of that! haiii.
- nelson was feeling lost cos everybody read the bk before so we were discussing it as an introduction.
- break for 2hours. played 7-up. tiff had to sing as forfeit. i had to stare at a guy for 10secs for forfeit -.- andafter that jy was like, 'ok from now on no more forfeit.' hurh! so obvious she wanted to toture me! ):
- no place in 3d art so.. to bad?
- went to library with hanisah.
- escaped in time from a game of truth or dare with fangyi luxi divya timothy, thanks to tingan (: i caused her to fall because of that! oh no! sorry sorry sorry.
- did some jap and went to canteen cos library was closing.
- wanted the lime thingy ice cream but bought the wrong one cos i took the first ice cream pack that i saw which had a lime green packet. ended up with some jelly thingy.
- waited waited waited for mummy. then i got pretty irritated with ******** and shouted at him. whoopsy! sorry sorry sorry.
- was talking to chicken little janelle tifff in the concourse before mummy came.
- end of thursday.

random (or not-so-random) stuff:
- im stressed just on the 1st week. my mum said it's cos the teachers thought we were recharged after the holidays.
- i caught a beetle in paper and threw it out the window. not before it got onto my hair. (gross!) i was screaming and screaming *widens eyes in innocence* and my sis told me to 'shut up' hahaaa
- my jap is dying.
- my chem shouldnt be able to accelerate.
- i have no more stuff to study for chem.
- im closer to 105 ppl than to 106 ppl.
- im dehydrating.
- i shrank from 158 to 157cm. and nelson was just saying he grew x cm taller, where x is a positive integer not less than 3. he was saying that in my face. hmph!
- jy said she didnt grow. but i shrank! (see the diff.?)
- h. chinese is realyl hard. im deproving. fast.


-end of story cos the 'low battery' thing just appeared-

went to school this morning. reached at about 7:45. went to the canteen to do some reading and some work. the teachers were all rushing everywhere preparing for a certain major event, which unfortunately, i havent heard anything of. anyway eeleng was already in the canteen, then after a while weilin came. 8:50 went to the hall and saw danielle mira joa and fen.

sat in the dance studio slacking cos a lot of ppl werent here yet. started prac only at about 9:30 (or later) i think. anyway started on a new dance. quite easy actually. only 2 parts that were a little tough.

anyway joa pulled my leg (literally), or rather, my sock. and i was trying not to scream (imagine how you would feel if suddenly something tugged at your leg) but the scream came out anyway. luckily it wasnt too loud.

after dance prac went home immediately cos i was hungry :p slept on the bus and my neck hurt a little now.

reached home... took a shower. and... the power tripped while i was bathing. >.< so.. no heater. and i had to turn the tap to the largest to get half the water supply of what i normally would get. anyway came out freezing and came down expecting lunch :p

but... apparently auntie thought i was done with lunch. ): now im freezing and starving. and im still not getting any lunch.

hmm. forget it. i shall pretend im on a diet. (yeah riight)

oh no. im feeling guilty about not giving a single thought to axis. but seriously, i cant think of anything to work on. but if i stick to the original idea... well... im not too sure...

yayy! finally managed to convince myself to practise dance. haahaa.

anyway... had a pretty boring day today. very boring, in fact. and theres nobody online to talk to! where did everybody gooooo...?

haii school's reopening soon.
very soon.

my goals for today:
1. practice for dance prac.
2. dump the useless things on my table.
3. sleep by 22:15 today.

possibilities of completing tasks:
1. 40%
2. 1%
3. 70%

ok today was the best day of the holidays.

reached sch, met with other ppl, then sac came. in the meantime, ms flo was 'briefing' us.

started with icebreaker games first. both teams lost! so we all ended up with powder in our hair and drawings on our faces as a form of souveniors. so anyway derrick came and we started hiphop. i sucked today. i forgot every step the moment i went up on stage >.< no actually not every. thats relatively impossible.

ok anyway started a 2nd dance item. then went for lunch. dumped almost me whole pack away.

went back, beng came. so... we started some workshoppy thingy. first we had.. some diagonal running thing. it was damn funny. anyway the order went wrong somewhere.. and i ended up having my head in a weird position and legs barely off the ground for one of the rounds. and my head wasnt touching the other guys' but i passed anyway :P

then we had a short talk. and then car-and-driver thingy. i almost cause renee to fall. whoops!

anyway had anothershort talk. talked about.. um.. things we normally wont talk about >.< go ask some of the ppl there. its ummm.. inconvenient to blog about everything we talked about.

anyway had some actions thingy. haahaa everybody was embarrassed badly >.<

anyway it was almost 5, so we had debriefing. said ty to everybody etc. etc. then ms flo talked to us about our items. co, strings not that sure what they were doing yet. dance not complete yet. choir has a rough idea. so... auditions wont be next friday.

anyway... about 22 ppl (i think) came today. danielle renee tiancheng angela mira eeleng nicholas tiffany (yr 4) aiwei jean kelly yihui shihui farah shikin aisha jiaxin and five other someones. >.< sad to say, i only know 17 ppl.

anyway... today was okayy i supposed.

i should seriously get more sleep. all the keeping late nights stuff is already showing on my face. and im feeling tired at 10 in the morning. not the 'havent wake up' kind of tired. its the 'i can sleep for the whole day if i want to' kind of tired.

and im not even up studying for chem or anything.

i hate it.

had a nice long sleep yesterday. sang myself to sleep. actually my sis sang me to sleep. she was singing jay chou's song. haahaa.

haii.

you know...

i keep wondering why i have all these kinds of demoralising thoughts. maybe its a lack of confidence.
or maybe its just because im not as good as everybody else. thats why i keep worrying about everything. im not as good as everybody else.

so i worry to convince myself that i am doing something about it. but who am i deceiving? nothing's gonna happen if i worry my whole life away or something.

but its instinctive. its like.. something's just there saying im the dumbest lousiest person on earth.

and i cant helpt believing it.

because thats what i've known since... forever.

im not as good as everybody else

if i were to just ignore and just shrug that feeling off.

if only it was that easy.

its like if i ever put that feeling down... a whole part of my life just sort of disintegrates.

because thats what i have been believing.

the whole world is sudddenly going in the other direction. and i currently have two seconds to adapt to it.

haii. school's reopening soon. that means... homework. and that reminds me. i havent give axis a single thought. time to start. get the creative juices flowing. [yeah like that's gonna ever happen]

20th march. teambuilding with sac.
23rd march. dance prac possibly with sac.
24th march. smo. probably not going for bbq.

26th march. sch reopens. aka hell.

haii. my mind is so used to tv, tv and story books everyday, im really not sure if she can get used to schoolwork anymore. my brain's like... *knocks on my head* empty. and absolutely unwilling to fill itself up starting 26th.

time for homework, homework and more homework.

no time for books anymore, except textbooks, that is.

and chinese starting again. im really sick of chinese now. im not even trying to do well. i mean,
1. i really dont want my english to deprove anymore
2. im plain bored of chinese lessons.
3. i really dont really like chinese.

but then again... i cant afford to let my grades fall anymore. haiii. i barely got an a last sem. any slips and i'll have a b+ soon.



wahhh. im really nervous about the teambuilding exercise coming tuesday. its like... im meeting ppl ive never met before. and just about a month later im supposed to dance alongside them. this is... nervewrecking. and i dont know why im feeling like this at all. maybe its just because im afraid to make all the mistakes when we're doing our dance; because im so lousy and everything compared to everyone else.



oh yah that reminds me. i need new track pants.